Preserving Marriage
What are some important points to remember in a happy marriage?
I don't have a degree in psychology, but I do study human nature. I have been married two times. I am fifty-two years of age, same age as my husband. We have been married for almost five years. Having been married before helped me remember the things not to do with this marriage.
One of the most important things to remember is never, never put each other down. It belittles the other person and makes them feel inferior. And it can be a cycle that is never ending. Partners argue back and forth like playing tennis. If one is upset with their partner, and they are very angry, wait till you calm down and ask if you could sit down and talk about it calmly.
Another important point that goes along with the first point is to tell your partner how good they are, tell them everyday about something they do you really like. My husband always tells me that I never fix a bad meal. That makes me feel great and inspires me to try new recipes on him. I always tell him how smart he is. He is very intelligent and has read and learned so much in his life. If I have a question I always ask him first. Most of the time he will know the answer.
Another point to me in a successful marriage is having a great sense of humor. If you can laugh about things in life more often, it will make each day a very pleasant one. My husband always makes me laugh about something. I treasure his sense of humor.
One might think this next point is a little ridiculous. But, I am here to tell you its very important, one of the most important points too. Joey, my husband, and I are always polite to each other. I always ask his opinion on things, or I always consider him first. He does me the same way. Having a giving attitude goes a long way in preserving a marriage. Always put the other one first. Believe me, it will come back to you many times.
Maybe I am old fashioned, but I believe the husband should be the head of the household. That said, it doesn't turn out that way for Joey and I. Because we always, ok, so we're not perfect and we do have our spats, think of the other first, and we make no decisions without the talking it over, it helps keep our marriage strong.
I know you've heard this many, many times....trust is so important in a marriage. Well, I have to say it too. It is so true. If you trust your spouse so much that it doesn't even bother you that he is next door talking to the neighbors wife, then you have a very strong marriage. Nothing will tear it apart. But, if you don't trust your spouse to even go to the store alone, then maybe you could sit down and talk it over. Otherwise your marriage might not make it.
Like I have stated before, I am not a psychologist, but I do know people. I have had many friends divorce and seen what went wrong from both points of view. I am not all knowing when it comes to marriage, but I can offer some advice that I think will help people keep their marriage strong. Thank you!
Submitted to INSIDERinfo by Mrs. Juanita Sutphin